We are now past the friendly comment from a stranger stage. He keeps talking. I take a better look at him, and he’s quite a character. His wild hair and navel-length beard is mostly white, his clothes are the kind of mish-mash you get from shopping in thrift stores, and he carries an old camera with a very, very long lens. I smell a rat. His talk about bike helmets for boobs — while he’s giving my boobs frequent looks — is not helping. I know I’m heavily equipped in the chest department, but if you want to look, be straight-forward or be subtle. This half-way thing is kind of creepy.

He compliments me on how fit I look and how I’m obviously staying healthy, and now this rat begins to stink. Really, buddy? Even dressing well doesn’t hide the fact that my fat rolls are stacked. I am getting a decent amount of muscle under that fat, but it’s nowhere near showing yet.

He keeps talking. About how much he loves dragons, and how he’s been working on this art project for over ten years now. He hasn’t told anyone about the details, not even his ex-girlfriend, because she only wanted to gossip about it. I know where this is going even before the words “back to nature” and “naked girls” leave his mouth.

Fine. This guy has already held me up for over five minutes, I can spare a few more for the entertainment value. I know I don’t look quite my age, and this guy has apparently pegged me as even younger than most people place me, because he keeps throwing the cheap compliments at me interspersed with “natural”, “back to basics”, and other assorted buzzwords. He’s taken pictures of all kinds of girls with all kinds of bodies, even 80-year old girls! Always girls, never women. He tries to ask about where I live. I tell him the general area, but don’t let him press me on details. I’m glad my sunglasses hide how fake my smile is.

It takes him another five minutes to get to the point. He wants to take my picture as I’m cycling naked down this very street, dragons painted all over my body! He spots my dragon tattoo, and nearly fondles my arm while going on about this is exactly what he had in mind, I should have dragons just like this painted all over me for his picture!

I ponder telling him where he can shove his 300mm lens, but I have a long and hilly way home, and I’ll need my energy for that. I get on my bike and push off before he can attempt to hold me back.

So how was your day?

It also has Arnold Schwarzenegger in a smart car. I’m seeing this film.

IsaDora Marzipan

I’m a sucker for green polishes. I’m a sucker for pastels. It’s a complete coincidence that IsaDora’s Marzipan followed me home from the shop today, honestly.

Marzipan is opaque in two coats, and reasonably well-behaved for a pastel. It’s not chalky, but does dry very quickly. It also felt like the polish was thickening in the bottle while I was painting. I expect I’ll have to thin this polish sooner rather than later.

My gaming group is playing Changeling: The Lost tomorrow, and green nails is par for the course on Changeling nights. However, plain green will not do for a game of faeries and magic. Additional coats of China Glaze Luxe and Lush provide the required sparkle.

Luxe and Lush is a golden flakie polish with a transparent base. The flakie density is nowhere near as good as Nfu.Oh’s pretty much perfect flakie polishes, but two coats give adequate sparkliness for this manicure.

Marzipan + Luxe and Lush

We’re ready to game!

Matte, shimmery charcoal? Swoon.

Not content with just the one duck, they threw in a couple of bonus ducks on the other side.

Good show, Bento&co.

The lovely green Agro on most nails, with Smoke and Ashes on the ring finger as an accent. Tarted up ever so slightly with silver striping tape. Photo taken just minutes after the manicure finished drying, and there's already tip drag, sigh...

Why yes, I just love receiving parcels that appear to have been stepped on multiple times.

Do you:

1. Call to ask if parcel can be delivered today before loading parcel onto car. Call before leaving previous delivery to let recipient know you’re coming soon. If delivery still fails, try again tomorrow.
2. Load the parcel onto the car. Call once when near the recipient’s door. Give up and deliver parcel to nearest post office instead.

If you answered 2, you are DHL and you suck. How do I, the eternal pedestrian, get a parcel full of extra-large bean bag home from the post office?

Two coats of Riveting, two additional coats of Electrify on middle and ring finger.

From left to right, top to bottom: Harvest Moon, Stone Cold, Fast Track, Agro, Smoke and Ashes, Electrify, Luxe and Lush, Riveting. All from the China Glaze Capitol Colours collection.